The Shift That Changed Everything: Our Journey to Restorative School Culture

When I first stepped into the role of principal at Garfield School which is located in Phoenix, Arizona, I quickly realized that our school community was yearning for a shift in how we approached discipline and relationships. Before implementing restorative practices, behavior was handled almost exclusively through punitive measures that focused on consequences rather than understanding. A typical day included a steady flow of students being sent to the office for talking back, walking out of class, refusing to complete work, verbal conflicts, and in some cases physical altercations. Many of our students carried trauma, academic gaps, and outside stressors that showed up as disruptive behavior, yet our systems at the time did little to address those underlying needs.

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What made the job especially hard was the reactive nature of our discipline model. Teachers felt they had no tools beyond writing referrals, and many expressed frustration that consequences rarely changed student behavior. Students, on the other hand, often sat through detentions or suspensions without meaningful conversations about what happened, why it happened, or how to repair the impact of their choices. It was common to see the same students cycling through the office multiple times a week, sometimes multiple times in a single day. This revolving door made it difficult for staff to build trust or establish consistency, and it created a school climate where both students and adults felt disconnected and exhausted.

We also noticed patterns that were hard to ignore. Certain classrooms were sending high numbers of referrals, student conflict between peer groups was escalating, and our middle schoolers in particular were showing signs of disengagement. Instead of feeling like a community, the school often felt like it was operating in crisis mode. The tension between wanting to support students while relying on outdated discipline systems weighed heavily on all of us. What we needed was a culture that prioritized connection, understanding, and accountability rather than punishment. This realization marked the beginning of our journey toward restorative practices, a journey that required patience, consistency, and most importantly, a shared belief that every child deserves to be heard and supported.

The transition was not easy at first. Many teachers were understandably skeptical, wondering if restorative practices would mean going soft on discipline. I knew our success depended on changing that mindset, so I began by leading with transparency and professional learning. We held training sessions where teachers learned to facilitate restorative conversations, explore the root causes of behavior, and use affective statements that foster empathy and reflection. I also modeled these practices myself by leading restorative circles with staff, ensuring everyone had a voice and felt part of the process. These experiences built trust and showed that restorative practices were not just for students, but for the entire community.

One of the most powerful moments that affirmed our progress came when a teacher approached me and asked if she could facilitate a restorative conversation with one of her seventh grade students. This student had been disengaged and disruptive in class, and instead of writing a referral, the teacher wanted to understand what was driving his behavior. Together, they sat down in a restorative conversation where both shared how they felt and what they needed to move forward. The student expressed that he often felt unheard in class, and the teacher shared how his behavior impacted her ability to teach. By the end of the conversation, they reached an understanding and created a plan to rebuild their classroom relationship. This moment showed me that restorative practices were no longer just an initiative; they had become part of our school culture.

Our middle school students also began to embrace these practices in meaningful ways. One day, a group of students came to my office and requested a restorative circle to address tension within their friend group. Instead of letting rumors and misunderstandings divide them, they wanted a safe space to express their feelings. During the circle, students shared honestly, listened respectfully, and acknowledged one another’s perspectives. What began as frustration turned into reconciliation. Watching students take ownership of their emotions and relationships was a clear sign that restorative practices were empowering them with lifelong social and emotional skills.

To ensure restorative practices were sustainable, I made structural changes to our school schedule. We intentionally built in protected time each day for social emotional learning, allowing students and teachers to engage in meaningful dialogue. These sessions became opportunities for reflection, team building, and community connection. Teachers used this time to check in with students, lead restorative circles, or discuss shared classroom values. By embedding social emotional learning into our daily routine, we made it clear that relationships and emotional well-being were just as important as academics.

Through this journey, I learned that transitioning from punitive to restorative is not about replacing discipline, it is about redefining it. Restorative practices teach accountability, empathy, and community responsibility in ways traditional systems never could. My best advice for other school leaders is to start with relationships, model the practices yourself, and give your staff and students space to grow into the process. When you lead with empathy and consistency, restorative practices stop being a strategy and start becoming part of your school’s identity, a culture where every voice matters and every conflict becomes an opportunity to heal and learn.

By: Jonathan Avilez